This sermon is from the Rev. Charles G. Dennison sermon archive, part of the “I Samuel 1-7” series, and was preached at Grace Orthodox Presbyterian Church in Sewickley, PA, during a worship service on Sunday, November 23, 1997.
About this sermon
The modern church tends to skip stories like this one, where panicked Philistines offer golden rats and tumors, as too strange to preach. Their confession comes close to ours, because looking to the cross of Christ means confessing the same wretched sinfulness they had to admit. The text already puts total depravity on display.
Sermon transcript
We come this morning to 1 Samuel 6. We begin our reading with verse 1. This is the word of God, so let us give our attention to it. Now, the ark of the Lord had been in the country of the Philistines seven months. and the Philistines called for the priests and the diviners, saying, What shall we do with the ark of the Lord? Tell us how we shall send it to its place.
They said, If you send away the ark of the God of Israel, do not send it empty, but you shall surely return to him a gilt offering. Then you will be healed, and it will be known to you why his hand is not removed from you.’ Then they said, What shall be the guilt offering which we shall return to him?’ And they said, Five golden hemorrhoids and five golden mice, according to the member of the Lords of the Philistines.
For one flared was on all of you and on your lords. So you shall make likenesses of your hemorrhoids and likenesses of your mice that ravage the land, and you shall give glory to the God of Israel. Perhaps he will ease his hand from you, your gods and your land. Why then do you harden your hearts as the Egyptians and Pharaoh hardened their hearts? When he had severely dealt with them, did they not allow the people to go and they departed?
Now therefore take and prepare a new cart and two milk cows on which there has never been a yoke, and hitch the cows to the cart and take their calves home, away from them. Take the ark of the Lord and place it on the cart and put the articles of gold which you returned to him as a gift offering in a box by its side. Then send it away that it may go. Watch, if it goes up by the way of its own territory, to Beth Shemesh, then he has done us this great evil. But if not, then we will know that it was not his hand that struck us, it happened to us by chance. Then the men did so and took two milk cows and hitched them to the cart and shut up their calves at home.
They put the Ark of the Lord on the cart and the box with the golden mice and the likenesses of their hemorrhoids. And the cows took the straight way in the direction of Beth Shemesh. They went along the highway, lowing as they went, but did not turn aside to the right or to the left. And the lords of the Philistines followed them to the border of Beth Shemesh. Now the people of Beth Shemesh were reaping their wheat harvest in the valley, and they raised their eyes and saw the ark and were glad to see it.
The cart came into the field of Joshua, the Beth Shemite, and stood there where there was a large stone, and they split the wood of the cart and offered the cows as a burnt offering to the Lord. The Levites took down the ark of the Lord and the box that was with it, in which were the articles of gold, and put them on the large stone, and the men of Beth Shemesh offered burnt offerings and sacrifices that day to the Lord. When the five lords of the Philistines saw it, they returned to Ekron that day. These are the golden hemorrhoids which the Philistines returned for a guild offering to the Lord, one for Ashdod, one for Gaza, one for Ascalon, one for Gath, and one for Ekron.
And the golden mice, according to the number of all the cities of the Philistines belonging to the five lords, both are fortified cities and country villages. the large stone on which they set the Ark of the Lord is a witness to this day in the field of Joshua the Beth Shemite. The Lord struck down some of the men of Beth Shemesh because they had looked into the Ark of the Lord. He struck down of all the people 50,070 men, and the people mourned because the Lord had struck the people with a great slaughter. The men of Beth Shemesh said that Who is able to stand before the Lord, this holy God?
And to whom shall he go up from us?’ So they sent messengers to the inhabitants of Kyriet-Jerim, saying, The Philistines have brought back the Ark of the Lord. Come down and take it up to you.’ And the men of Kyriet-Jerim came and took the Ark of the Lord and brought it into the house of Abinadab, on the hill, and consecrated Eleazar his son to keep the Ark of the Lord. From the day that the ark remained at Kiriath-Jerim, the time was long, for it was twenty years, and all the house of Israel lamented after the Lord.”
Our Lord, we are confident about your word and its power. We are confident about the promises that are contained in it and the grace that is communicated. Father, we would also be confident of the effectiveness of your word. as it is proclaimed here, as it is proclaimed throughout your church, this day, and throughout the world. Father, may it please you to grant grace to your people who come and sit beneath your word that they might be refreshed. And Father, may it also please you in this day to call many to yourself that there would be that wonderful transformation, even from death to life, for those who are called unto eternal life, even by the Spirit of your mercy. Father, we would ask for those who serve in mission posts, in evangelistic enterprises, that your grace would be upon them as they proclaim your word fearlessly today. We would also ask our God that your people would grow in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, in whose name we pray. Amen.
Now, it may well be that the modern, urbane, sensitive, sophisticated Establishment Church would never find an occasion to speak about 1 Samuel 5 and 6. But if it did, it would pause Only briefly, at best for a grudging acknowledgment, most assuredly making comment about the primitive character of the text, and then hurry along. of the modern, urbane, sensitive, sensible, sophisticated establishment church, as thoroughly vague and assertive, progressively prophetic, come hell or high water in the interests of a truth that they must invariably set before the world. Or no, not at all. is as prudish and as Victorian as any fundamentalist body, for such a Church is likely to find the material here in 1 Samuel 5 and 6 to be a bit too crude, even indecent, for public presentation. Interestingly, both fundamentalists and liberals start nervously checking their watches, fumbling with their bulletins, squirming in their pews when the iradvised preacher foolishly wanders into chapters like these. But of course, you recognize immediately how hypocritical such reactions from liberals and conservatives are. This past week, in checking two conservative Bible surveys, I found that neither made the slightest reference to these chapters. They skipped over them altogether.
Here are the people sworn at least according to their press releases. Here are the people sworn to the defense of biblical integrity, who made such protestations against the attempts to diminish the authority of the entirety of Scripture, who have presented themselves as those committed to resist all efforts to subtract one jot or one tittle from the biblical text. However, these very people, it would seem, employ their own methods of selectivity, of inclusion and exclusion, when it comes to the scriptural record. In keeping with their methodology, they, no less than the nervous liberal, had decided that, in viewing a text like 1 Samuel 5 and 6, The less said, the better.
This is an unfortunate response because it exposes in the conservative a fundamental failure to live up to his own principle. The whole of the Word of God, all of the text, The Bible in its entirety. But if we witness this breakdown in the conservative, even more glaring is the breakdown in the liberal.
After all, isn’t the liberal church and its liberal pastor the ones who believe that it is their mission in life to reinvent the social norms? Secondly, they are not above shocking people. Isn’t it the liberal church and the liberal minister who are the ones who measure their success by the readings, that their ethical and theological pronouncements register upon the sociological and ecclesiastical rigor scale?
The church that is not too embarrassed to promote the most radical versions of political and social redesign. The church that is not too embarrassed to promote things like same-sex marriages, gay and lesbian agendas, goddess worship, abortion on demand. and divorce for anyone who feels like it. Is all too embarrassed by 1 Samuel 5 and 6?
The Church, none too sensitive about important obscenities. I’m not exaggerating here. And if you are an observer of the Church scene and witnessed the goings-on during this last summer in the major assemblies and the major bodies, you know that I am not exaggerating. The Church, none too sensitive about importing obscenities and blasphemies into their very courts, as well as into their sanctuaries. would be unnerved and unsettled by the mention of holistings with chemeraids?
Let’s get serious. The liberal establishment, for all its platitudinous outrage, for all its self-generated, self-righteous, and self-referenced moral programming, is a sham, a complete and utter fake, more laughable and pitiful than the Philistines in their humiliated state. Now, having heard what I have said about the liberals and conservatives, I know you won’t be at all upset to learn that I plan ten more messages on 1 Samuel 5 and 6. Not really. But let me ask you this, what if I were planning ten more messages?
Could you be comfortable with that? Knowing that you would be having set before you, week by week, yes, even here in these chapters, the Word of God. I trust that you would be comfortable as a minister of the Word would take you to any place in Scripture and ask you to consider it in light of the intention of God himself.
It is, after all, his Word. He put this stuff here, and that for our benefit. Well, so much for the apology. What about the story? The storyline from these chapters, and yes, from the chapter that precedes them, is by now known to you, I trust, if it wasn’t previously.
The Israelites, as represented in Eli’s family, had brought God’s wrath upon themselves and suffered a monumental double defeat at the hands of the Philistines. You can read about that in chapter 4. But the Philistines, in their second victory, captured the sacred Ark of the Covenant of the Lord, which the Israelites had superstitiously and foolishly brought into their camp. The loss of the ark registers upon the people, again represented in Eli and his family, as the loss of God’s glory. Indeed, as the fourth chapter ends, the glory has departed.
Now, as we look to chapters 5 and 6, the ark moves through the Philistine plague-like tumors—actually, yes, hemorrhoids—and an assault upon their society, their cities, as those cities are overrun with an infant infestation of mice or maybe even rats. The Philistines then consult their theologians and their mediums, who advise on the matter of the Ark’s return to its home country. Make replica, they say, of the plague’s manifestations as a gift offering to Israel’s God. Five golden hemorrhoids, one each for the five wards of the Philistines, and five golden rats, one each for the five Philistine cities, these to accompany the ark on its return. Now, if we were amused by what we heard in chapter 5, when we come to chapter 6, we are about to be amused again, if you can imagine this, making five golden hemorrhages to accompany the five rocks.
And you may be thinking to yourself, what in the world is going on here? There is great instruction in this, even as God superintends the wisdom of the Philistine theologians. The making of these golden articles is for the sake of underscoring Philistine humiliation. You get the point. What the Philistines are now compelled to admit is not only that they have hemorrhoids, they are hemorrhoids. That is what is being said. There are five lords. Not only is this the matter that applies to the people, it applies to the people who are in control, their leaders. There are five lords. The hemorrhoids match up to the five lords. Not only do their cities have rats, not only do their cities have vermin, their cities and their society are vermin.
And the instruction that comes from the theologians amongst the Philistines and their diviners is that an act of absolute humiliation is necessary in order for there to be release. Or, you could put it this way, salvation, deliverance. The making of these golden articles, then, is a concession. It is an act of utter humiliation. by which these people are declaring what they are and what their society is. Now, you may be thinking that this is utterly bizarre, that this is thoroughly and completely pagan.
But I want to remind you of the experience of the children of Israel in Numbers chapter Do you remember the story about the grumbling Israelites in Numbers 21? When God, provoked by them, set up with them, sends into their camp fiery serpents. You may be at a loss to explain what happens after that, because God commands Moses to make a bronzed serpent, and to lift up that bronzed serpent before the people with the promise that all who look to the bronzed serpent will be saved from the plague. In the foresting case, Hemingway erodes. In Israelite case, a serpent.
What is going on in Numbers 21? Do you realize what is happening? By the making of that bronze serpent, and by the people walking to it in faith, it is a confessional act. Can you tell me the nature of that confessional act? Do you know what the people are confessing? They are confessing that they’re snakes, that they’re the seed of the serpent. and they have no hope at all, except God’s sake. Mighty instruction for us here, even with regard to our own confession.
What is it that you think you are acknowledging when you look to the cross of Christ? Behind the cross you see a smiling face, and the words of the smiling face, God love you, have a nice day. But you always get the impression that that is all there is to the cross, in listening to many speak about it. Jesus picks up on that Numbers 21 passage in John chapter 3.
He suggests that the lifting up of the bronze serpent by Moses anticipates His being lifted up upon the cross, that by looking to the cross there is an acknowledgment on the part of the people who do look in faith concerning their own condition, the truth about themselves. What is that truth? If I were to join serpent to cross, what is that truth? That truth is that I am a son of Satan, a child of darkness, that I am sold out under through my sins and my transgressions, and apart from my confession of this truth, there is no salvation for me.
But of course, as you look to the cross, you see so much more, don’t you? You see yourself as serpentine. You see yourself the snake, the descendant of the seed of the serpent. You see yourself as such, but you also see one who has in effect joined himself to the image of the serpent, and that willingly, and that in his righteousness, taking your serpent-like character to himself, that you might become a child of God. Now, you wouldn’t have thought that all of that was to be found in five golden hemorrhoids and five golden mice.
But you can see that if I am determined to preach the gospel from 1 Samuel 6, I am bound and determined to preach it from anywhere. And I trust that you are benefiting from it. Or maybe you think you’re better than the Philistines. Or maybe you think you’re better than the Israelites.
The bottom line to this portion of scripture is, there is none righteous, no, not one. our Father. Indeed, as we are drawn to look to the cross of Christ, we are horrified in the acknowledgment that we are the children of the serpent. But yet, O God, even as we are compelled now by your Spirit to gaze, we are convinced also that this one our Savior, who has hung upon the cross, has taken to himself our serpent-like character and deeds, that he might bear that in his body for us, in order that we might become the children of God. Father, at this time of year when we are thinking about the giving of thanks, We ask that we might give thanks from the depths of our hearts for this truth and this reality, not seeing ourselves as more righteous than ancient Philistines or Israelites, but at one with them in our corrupted nature. Bless us, O Father, then, with a joyous season of praise and thanksgiving, because we believe even as we have looked to the cross, we believe that Christ came into the world to save sinners such as ourselves. We do, in fact, O God, thank you for his ministry on our behalf, and ask you that we might be blessed in our souls and in our hearts with thanksgiving that is full and overflowing. as we ask in Jesus name.
The sermon text provided above is derived from the sermon audio recording making use of generative tools. It has not been manually edited. While transcription tools have a high degree of accuracy, the output may include generative textual, punctuation, and/or formatting errors.

